grampy

i don't know why i've been thinking about my grandfather so much in the last two days. Grampy was a good old fashioned funny guy... he'd chase me around the house with the yardstick if i gave him to much flap, he'd threaten to grab the pliers when i had a loose tooth, he always wanted bacon and he always sang "we're all in our places with sunshiney faces.. good morning to you, good morning to you" in such a horrible voice that all us kids would cover our ears and scream "Stop Grampy, Stop!!" You'd get in the car with him and he'd say "hang on to your toenails, grampys driving!!" and until i was 13 i thought that yellow lights meant to go faster.
I loved that man... he died when i was 12.... but he didn't leave for 10 years. I would have dreams that he was in the kitchen and i'd look up and say grampy? don't you know your dead now? and he would laugh at me and ask for bacon.... i had a series of dreams right after he died, one was up in his fathers cabin in maine. and there was my grandfather, the way he looked before he got sick... then i looked in the sliding glass door and there were reflections of him. one as a young man, maybe early 30's, and another one of him as a teenager w/ bright red hair. I'll never forget that. then there was the dream where i finally got to say goodbye to him.... this was the only one that didn't take place in a real world place, but in an outerspace fun park... only i couldn't see him only hear his voice.... i remember crying in the dream and saying i had never gotten to say goodbye.... i remember feeling loved.
For 10 years we would go to my grandparents house and you could feel him in there. I used to be scared to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night... lol.... i loved my grandfather... i didn't want to see his ghost....
Then my grandmother got sick... and thats when things got kinda strange... the dreams picked up again... not just with me, but with other members of the family. there are stories of TV's turning on and off... and other random happenings in the house.... and shortly before my grandmother died i was one of five people in my family who had roughly the same dream, where my grandfather came to me and told me not to worry about my grandmother cuz he was going to take her up.
My grandmother lost her short battle with lung cancer.... i remember going into their house, my grandparents house after one of the wakes, my mother was sitting at the kitchen table, she looked at me and asked me how it felt to be in this house with nanny gone... and for the first time in my life it felt empty............ no nanny, no presence of grampy.... he kept his promise and walked her up.........